Husbands, we are instructed to love our wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. (Eph.5:25). Our chapter provides three ways to identify with Christ in loving our wives as he has perfectly loved the church. First, Christ's love is unconditional. (Rom. 5:8). Christ didn't love us based on our intelligence, loveliness, or holiness, but he still chose us because he chose us - this is how we are to love our wives. Second, Christ's love is sacrificial. Just as Christ ultimately gave himself for his bride, the church, we too must lay down our desires to be served and serve our wives! R. Kent Hughes writes, "Marriage is a call to die [to self], and a man who does not die for his wife does not come close to the love which he is called." (pg. 70). Lastly, Christ was concerned for the church's holiness. Do you see the husband's role as a divinely ordained responsibility to shepherd your wife in her sanctification? Frustrations arise in a wife's heart when her husband fails to love her and lead her.

A few questions to consider: 

1. How well are you pursuing loving your wife as Christ loves the church according to the three ways stated above?

2. Is your wife frustrated? Is it because you have failed to love her? Is it because you failed to lead her?

3. Husbands, after reflecting on these things, have a conversation with your wife about areas in which you want to love her more like Christ. Pray together and ask the Lord for grace to grow in your love and leadership for the good of your marriage and the glory of God! 

The Shepherd Leader at Home: Knowing, Leading, Protecting, and Providing for Your Family