Chapter 6: The Shepherd Leads His Children
As a young boy, I longed for my two older brothers to “show me the way.” I really didn’t know what I was asking (I’m pretty sure they had no clue either), but I at least wanted them to lead me, somewhere to some place. Fast forward forty years, now a father with four children (and many more mistakes), here are three elements that should mark parental leadership (with the help of our esteemed author of course, Timothy Witmer):
Lead according to Principle- it’s easy for expediency, profit, pleasure, and personal fulfillment to drive decision making (89). I can tell you, this only leads to heartache. Instead, make decisions on principle. This runs against the grain of most peers, social media, and the culture at large, but it instills in our children the values of courage, trust, and devotion. It will be hard, but the right way is not often the easy way.
Lead by Example- if you really want to influence your children, “walk the walk” as we used to say. “The things that matter to you are the things for which you make room in your own life, and your children are watching” (89). Our talk and even our teaching can be right on, but if it is not backed up by our example, it will be counterproductive (91).
Lead Them to Seek Wise Counsel- A wise man doesn’t have all the answers (and more wise when he knows he doesn’t), therefore, he should seek wisdom from God’s word and from others (92). It’s critical to demonstrate to your children where to find good counsel. Encourage them to develop relationships with older Christians, mentors, and pastors. As your children move from being influenced to influential, wise counsel will benefit their lives greatly.